“Maybe you Should go back to the Kitchen Where you Belong, lil sis.”

This was one of the many sexist remarks I encountered as an academic in both professional and public settings. It disregarded my perspectives on socio-political issues but instead put me down based on my gender and the stereotypes associated with it.

Though some may dismiss such comments as harmless, it is essential to consider the potential implications for the receiver of these comments and, if not careful, how they may lead to something more nefarious. When I was an aspiring academic many years ago, I once received a comment which threatened rape.

Ironically, this comment was delivered in a light tone akin to being playful during an academic discussion with a supposedly learned individual.

While eager to learn and make meaningful contributions to public disco

Unfortunately, my experience is not unique.

Concerning Global Trend

Globally, countless women have faced similar situations. Data revealed that 38% of women had personally experienced online violence, and of this group, 65% reported exposure to hate speech, including derogatory remarks targeting their gender.

In the Asia-Pacific region, the situation is equally concerning. 60% of women parliamentarians surveyed said they had been targeted by hate speech, disinformation, image-based abuse or doxxing.

The data underscores a grim reality: gender-based discrimination and online harassment continue to thrive, even among women who hold positions of authority.

Sexist remarks are bad enough for their discriminatory or stereotypical nature. However, the impact

For example, the “joke” of rape trivialises one of the most horrible crimes that can be committed towards a woman into something “acceptable.”

In addition to the risk to one’s personal security, sexist hate speech also results in adverse psychological effects. They undervalue and objectify women, sometimes to the point of ruining their reputation. This erodes their self-esteem and pushes women to withdraw from the spaces where their voices are most needed.

A qualitative Universiti Putra Malaysia (UPM) study by Farah Mursyieda explores male and female victims’ experiences of hate speech within political discourse. It was presented at the recent Gender Outlook Forum and supported the above concerns.

1. Both men and women were attacked based on identity factors, but women were more likely to face gendered and sexualised hate speech, including threats of rape.

2. Women shared that their experiences with hate speech left a heavy emotional toll on them, while men often minimised the impact.

3. As a result of receiving hate speech, most of the women limited their self-expression or reduced engagement in public discourse.

While hate speech affects everyone, its gendered dimensions are significant. The UPM study found that female victims often experienced anger and shame, with some internalising the hatred.

Public shaming, often couched in moral judgment, has led some women to believe they “deserved” such comments for daring to speak. Others reported regretting being born female. The most severe cases involved rape threats, which were something male participants in the study did not encounter.

This culture of intimidation has caused many women to step back from public life or avoid discussing “sensitive” topics altogether. Personally, young female academics and professionals have confided in me about their fears of expressing their opinions, even in closed meetings.

Some have even turned down invitations to speak at public events because they are afraid of being subjected to hostile verbal attacks. Regardless of the industry, such fear limits women’s professional growth and silences important perspectives. And while institutional efforts to empower women have expanded in recent years, the persistence of sexist hate speech threatens to undermine those gains.

Eventually, self-censorship compounds gender inequities, as women are already underrepresented in political and leadership spaces.

The experiences of M

One female politician shared her experience as a target of online abuse in political spaces. Notably, she believed that the constant hostility against female politicians risks normalising gender discrimination and discouraging women from joining the public service altogether.

Politics can be a contentious topic, and its discourse can trigger criticism. This is normal in a democratic society, but we must continue to treat everyone with respect, even when we disagree with certain policies or their implementation. Resorting to abuse, vulgar remarks, slander, and threats of violence should never be allowed in the name of democracy or “constructive” criticism.

The experiences of Malaysian female politicians extend beyond the arena of politics, as some women may be deterred from taking on decision-making roles where they must articulate and defend their positions. This is attributed to the fear of being the subject of online abuse which adds yet another obstacle to women’s advancement.

Returning Women Their Voices

Governments worldwide have introduced laws, policies and programmes to advance women’s participation in public life. Within ASEAN, these initiatives align with the ASEAN Community Vision 2045, which champions the empowerment of women in different fields.

ASEAN has seen marked improvement in women’s access to education, reproductive health and employment opportunities—progress that Malaysia’s Deputy Foreign Minister, Mohamad Bin Haji Alamin, highlighted at the Institute of Diplomacy & Foreign Relations (IDFR)’s recent Forum on ASEAN: Shaping a More Inclusive and Sustainable Future.

Malaysia, too, has made progress. The country’s female labour force participation rose in the last five decades, alongside a narrowing gender pay gap. In the recent Budget 2026 announcement, Prime Minister Anwar Ibrahim revealed that as of 1 October  2025, 45% of public-listed companies have met the target of having at least 30% female directors on their boards.

But progress in policy must be matched by a cultural and systemic response to hate. Protecting everyone from hate speech must continue to be a priority. Governments, social media platforms and tech companies are working together to identify, monitor and address such abuse. This will ensure that victims receive adequate support and that perpetrators face appropriate legal consequences.

Victims of hate speech have several avenues to report incidents of online abuse. They may report directly to social media platform providers, and/or lodge a complaint with the Malaysian Communications and Multimedia Commission (MCMC), requesting that the offensive content be removed.

They can also choose to make a police report, as the offensive comment received may breach laws such as Section 233 of the Communications and Multimedia Act (CMA). If the conduct falls within the definition of sexual harassment, victims may also lodge a complaint with the Tribunal for Anti-Sexual Harassment–a more accessible and expeditious means for victims to seek redress against their perpetrators.

While legal frameworks help to moderate harmful content and mitigate its impact, our individual roles are just as crucial. Reporting these incidents would provide some protection to the victims and hold the offenders to account.  Ultimately,

Harmful “Harmless Jokes”

While sexist remarks are frequently brushed off as humour, consistent exposure to such comments, particularly those containing threats or violent language, has a detrimental effect. This abuse can significantly lower one’s self-concept and suppress a person’s willingness to express themselves.

It took me more than a decade after the rape threat to finally regain my voice and

My personal experience, alongside the shared experiences of others, serves as a reminder that hate speech, whether wrapped in humour or hostility, is never harmless. When we see someone being vilified or attacked regardless of gender, we have a moral responsibility to speak up. If we remain silent, hatred prevails and violence may follow. And that is a realisation that we as a society need to wake up to.